


Out of Memory

by creativityobsessed



Category: 30歳まで童貞だと魔法使いになれるらしい | Cherry Magic! Thirty Years of Virginity Can Make You a Wizard?! (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, angst with happy ending, lots of angst first though, more tags will be added when they're not spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-23
Packaged: 2021-03-25 03:07:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30082542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creativityobsessed/pseuds/creativityobsessed
Summary: Between strange occurrences and odd emotions, something is not quite adding up for Kurosawa. Could the answer be hidden in his phone, which is suddenly and mysteriously out of memory?
Relationships: Adachi Kiyoshi/Kurosawa Yuichi
Comments: 32
Kudos: 52





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to [unacaritafeliz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/unacaritafeliz) for beta, and writing my summary for me again. Thanks to [Zee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zscribez) for being the guinea pig to make sure it made sense.

Kurosawa Yuichi has officially been nursing his crush on Adachi for seven years, three months, and two weeks. He’d fallen for him mid-August the year after they’d both joined the company, and now, at the end of December seven years later, he still hasn’t found a way to approach him. He sighs, and looks up to find the back of Adachi’s head out of habit. He really should figure out a way to do something about this.

He was reminded this morning about it when he checked his calendar and noticed an extra appointment for two days from now, one he’d forgotten about. It declared that he had a date on Christmas Eve, which is strange because he’d never set anything up. He certainly would have remembered if he was taking Adachi on his first date on Christmas Eve. It was in his handwriting, though, so he assumed his mother set it up and told him about it, and then as soon as he wrote it down he forgot.

He sighs again. Nevermind figuring out how to get Adachi to notice him - what he really needs is a reason to get his mother to stop trying to set him up with people. She means well, of course, but she tells him constantly about her worries, about how she’s so far away that she couldn’t do anything if he got hurt, and wouldn’t it be better if he had a partner who could take care of him? He'd tell her that he’s only ever been interested in one partner, but that he can’t seem to get his attention, but then she’d just meddle further, try and get Aneki involved maybe, to contrive situations to push them together. He doesn’t want that. He doesn’t want Adachi doing anything he doesn’t want to do. Strangely that thought brings tears to his eyes.

“Kurosawa, are you ready?” Rokkaku asks from his desk across the way. Kurosawa shakes himself out of his thoughts and looks at his watch. He has a sales appointment across town in a half hour, and he’d told Rokkaku to be ready now. He reaches for his bag and begins gathering his things.

“Just a moment, I was finishing something up,” he says. He bends down, pretending to tie his shoe, and blinks back the tears that have gathered in his eyes. He’s been the same distance from Adachi for seven years, why is it suddenly making him so emotional now? He swallows, trying to regain control, and then stands to lead Rokkaku out of the office.

The taxi ride with Rokkaku is anything but quiet, but Kurosawa barely has to say anything and finds his mind slipping back to the strange “Date” on his calendar. He’ll have to text his mother and ask for details, because he didn’t write down anything else - a time, a location, or even who he’d be meeting. On the other hand, if he doesn’t text her, he could just say he forgot. Perhaps that was best. With the mood he’s in, a blind date would be a disaster. Well, nevermind his mood, a blind date is always going to be a disaster until he gets over his crush on Adachi. He hasn’t even looked at anyone else in the whole seven years.

The sales meeting takes the whole rest of Kurosawa’s afternoon, for which he’s grateful. He doesn’t want to go back to work and see Adachi. He doesn’t want to think about what a coward he’s been, waiting quietly for seven years just hoping Adachi would notice him. Besides, he feels weirdly off. His relationship, or lack thereof, with Adachi has never bothered him before, but suddenly it has somehow become an all-consuming weight.

But finally, the meeting is over, and he can go home. As he and Rokkaku walk out of the office building where their meeting was, Rokkaku strikes up his usual chatter, and Kurosawa half listens for points when he should respond, but mostly focuses on thoughts of getting home, where he can feel his emotions in peace.

“Are you okay, Kurosawa?” Rokkaku asks, and Kurosawa finally looks at him.

“I- what? Yes, of course I’m okay,” Kurosawa says, putting on his best customer smile, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Oh, I don’t think they noticed, but you seemed a little off today that’s all. I wondered if it was because something happened between you and Adachi, you both seemed a little down today.”

Kurosawa blushes.

“Me… and Adachi?” he asks, his heart in his throat. Has he been so obvious that even Rokkaku, oblivious Rokkaku, has noticed? “Why would you say something had happened between us?”

“Oh I don’t know, it seemed like you were avoiding each other today, and like I said you were both kind of down, right? I’m just guessing though. Was it family stuff? If you don’t mind sharing, of course, I’m just worried about you, that’s all.”

“Oh,” Kurosawa answers, and he can feel the tension in his shoulders relax. Rokkaku doesn’t know anything, he’s just guessing. And it’s possible that he _had_ been avoiding Adachi a little, subconsciously, since he’d been feeling down about his feelings all day. He notices Rokkaku waiting for him to say something, and he just gives him a tight smile.

“Nothing happened, Rokkaku, we all just occasionally have a bad day. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to head home…”

“Of course, I shouldn’t keep you, I have a meetup with friends myself, actually, so have a good night, and I’ll see you tomorrow!”

“Wait!” Kurosawa stops him, “I thought you were going back to the office? To drop off the paperwork.” Rokkaku pauses and his eyes widen.

“I completely forgot!” he exclaims, and then he checks his watch, “Oh but I’m meeting my friends in half an hour in the other direction, I’ll never make it on time, can you do it, please? Just this once?”

Kurosawa sighs. As the junior salesman, Rokkaku really should be the one to do it, but Kurosawa doesn’t have the energy to fight him on this tonight.

“Fine. Hand it over,” he holds out a hand, and Rokkaku pulls a sheaf of papers from his briefcase.

Rokkaku leaves quickly after that, probably worried that Kurosawa will change his mind. He sighs, and flags down a taxi, making his way back to the office. The traffic is terrible, but he doesn’t mind - the later it is, the less likely he is to run into anyone. Into Adachi.

Sure enough, the office is mostly dark, and completely empty. Kurosawa sits at his desk for a few moments, before flipping through the papers to make sure all the signatures were there one last time, and leaving it on the Chief’s desk. Almost everything is online these days, but the actual signatures have to be on paper for some silly reason.

Finally ready to go home, he squares his shoulders, and heads for the door. When he gets home, he’ll make up something easy for dinner, he thinks. He’ll have to check what he has in the fridge, and-

“Oh, excuse me,” Adachi says, and Kurosawa starts. They’re standing in the doorway and had nearly run into each other. Adachi looks… well, honestly, Rokkaku was right, Adachi looks terrible.

“Sorry,” Kurosawa says, flashing Adachi a concerned smile, “Are you okay?” He means it to be about everything but Adachi probably won’t take it that way.

“Of course! I’m fine, I just, I wasn’t watching where I was going. I-” Adachi finally looks up at him, and Kurosawa feels something twinge inside him when their eyes meet. He doesn’t know if it’s something in the air or what but for some reason even looking at Adachi makes him feel like crying.

“Are _you_ okay, Kurosawa?” Adachi asks, after they’ve been staring at each other for far too long. Kurosawa can’t remember the last time Adachi used his name, and it makes his heart jump in his chest.

“I-” _how do I tell you that I love you after seven years of pining?_ “Yes, I wasn’t paying attention either, you just startled me. I, uh, I had some paperwork to file.” He points over his shoulder and Adachi glances in that direction. “I honestly thought everyone else had left.”

“Oh.”

They stand like that a few more moments, and Adachi looks up at him and then away again multiple times. It’s strange, actually, usually Adachi is too shy to look at whoever he’s talking to directly. When did he start doing that?

“Well, I still have a little work to do,” Adachi says, gesturing towards his desk. Kurosawa realizes he’s in Adachi’s way and stumbles backwards. Of course Adachi isn’t becoming more comfortable with Kurosawa, he was just waiting for him to move out of the way.

“Right! See you tomorrow,” Kurosawa says, as Adachi ducks around him, “Don’t work too late!” Adachi nods without looking around, and keeps going.

Kurosawa walks to the elevator before letting out a deep sigh. That felt like the most awkward conversation he’s ever had with Adachi, and yet it was also the longest. He wonders if he should try again tomorrow, if this might be the beginning of something. He has the brief urge to go get a can of coffee and offer to _help_ Adachi with his work, but after the conversation they just had that might be a bit too much.

He turns the conversation over and over in his mind the whole way home, unsure what to make of it, in the end. He’s still contemplating when he absently opens the refrigerator to find something to throw together for dinner, and he pauses to stare in shock. How had he forgotten the huge meal he’d made yesterday? It had been way more than he could eat by himself, and in the end he hadn’t even been hungry for his portion, so he’d boxed it all up and put it in the fridge for later. But… _why_ had he made it again?

Well, nevermind, it means he has easy food now. He grabs a plate that can go in the microwave, and serves up a plateful of food.

No, not nevermind. Why can’t he remember last night? He remembers making the food, and bits of setting the table, and the feeling that candles were a bit too much, which he supposes makes sense given it was just a meal for him. He wanders over to the calendar, and peers at it, wondering if there was some big reason that he’d decided to make something fancy. Yesterday, the 21st, is marked as “Presentation,” which is absolutely true, he had a trip to Osaka yesterday for a special presentation, and had spent the whole day out of the office. But that wasn’t typically a reason to go all out on dinner, he has those all the time.

The microwave dings, but he ignores it. Something strange is going on. He pulls open his desk drawer and paws through it looking for a pencil - perhaps he wrote something and erased it and a rubbing might show that. He shoves aside a red leather box, and then tilts his head. He doesn’t remember where that came from, has he always had it? He pulls it out instead, and flips it open, and inside are nestled two red enamel pens with gilt trimming. They look quite nice - had they been a gift from a client, perhaps?

But that’s not the important thing right now, so he closes it again and sets it aside, finally finding the pencil he was looking for. He tips it so that the side is against the paper, and begins rubbing gently inside the square for yesterday… but nothing shows up. _Strange_.

The microwave beeps again, and he takes the plate out and brings it to his desk. He sits to eat and stares at the calendar. Something really is weird. There’s too many strange things happening in a row, and Kurosawa doesn’t like it. He’s not someone to believe in coincidences. He’s beginning to suspect he’s forgotten something really important, but he has no idea what it is, or even how to figure it out.

His eyes slide over to the “Date” marked on Thursday. He probably should call his mother to cancel, but if he does that, he’ll just have to argue with her about why he’s not going. Easier to just pretend he forgot, and apologize to her later. He can hardly tell her that his life is full of things that don’t make sense right now, and going on a date with someone who isn’t the love of his life isn’t a thing he wants to add to that.

He fiddles with the flap of the pen box, wondering just how he’s going to put together the pieces of what happened.

Kurosawa sighs. This is too much for a late night after a long day. He gathers his meal and moves to the couch, folding a leg underneath him as he sits. Just then his phone buzzes. He sets his plate on the coffee table, and digs his phone out of his pocket, lighting up the screen with a tap.

 _Out of memory_ , a small notification bar declares. Kurosawa squints at it, tilting his head. Out of memory? Since when? He hardly uses his phone for anything besides work and calling his family once in a while. He lifts a bite of steak to his mouth and chews absently as he opens the settings menu to investigate. It takes him a moment to tab through the various places where storage might be - it’s not like he uses the settings on his phone all that much either - and then he lands on a page with a bar divided up colorfully by the different applications using his storage. The bar is indeed, nearly full - and almost half yellow. Kurosawa squints at the screen. Yellow, according to the legend across the bottom, is the color for his photo library.

Kurosawa swallows and takes another bite of steak. He has almost never used the camera on his phone, despite it being a quite good one. There just wasn’t any need, really. Occasionally if he needed to save some information… but had he really done it enough over the past few years that his memory was full? What on earth could be in there? He closes the settings page and goes hunting for the little “photos” icon, buried on the third page of apps because he uses it so little.

The photos take a moment to load. He swallows his last bite, and reaches for another. Before his hand even makes it to the plate, the first picture loads, and he freezes. It’s Adachi, smiling at the camera, in a casual sweatshirt and puffy blue vest. He’s got a bit of cream from a crepe stuck to his upper lip, and he’s waving a hand at the camera as if to tell the picture taker to stop. Where had this come from? Wait, also, there’s no crepe in the frame, how did he know it was a crepe?

More photos begin to load, and it’s just picture after picture after picture of Adachi, in the same outfit, at TokyoDome City. Here he is riding a hippopotamus on the merry-go-round, and there he’s posing in front of a silly banner advertising the ferris wheel. And there-- Kurosawa yeets his phone away from him, because there, very clearly, is a shot of Adachi _with him_. Kurosawa cannot remember having been that close to Adachi in his entire life, much less for long enough to take a selfie together.

The phone, which landed face down, begins talking. He must have tapped something in his hurry to get it away from him.

“Is that video?” Adachi’s voice comes from the phone. Kurosawa reaches for it hesitantly.

“That’s definitely video, I just heard the beep!” Adachi says, nervous laughter in his voice. Kurosawa flips over the phone, jerking his hand back as if it was hot. Adachi is slightly angled in the frame, dressed in a loose t-shirt and track pants.

“That’s a video!” Adachi says one more time, pointing at the camera, and finally the camera starts to move. Kurosawa can hear someone else in the background protesting, and the frame shakes, sometimes on Adachi’s waving hands, sometimes catching his bare feet on an unfamiliar wooden floor.

The video freezes, having come to an end, and Kurosawa sniffles. He brings the phone within inches of his nose, and swipes a finger across the play bar, restarting the video. This is a side of Adachi that Kurosawa has never seen before, relaxed and open. There’s some kind of mark on his cheek and his hair is still sleep-mussed. This Adachi is cute in a way he has never seen before, and it makes his heart feel like it’s going to burst in his chest. This Adachi is domestic and happy, and everything he has ever dreamed of.

 _How_ does he have these? How could he have these? He can’t remember taking _any_ of them. Is he dreaming? He pinches himself, hard, on his arm, and the pain stings. It’s real, then.

But if it’s real, then how did he get them? And why can’t he remember having gotten them? Should he ask Adachi? Asking Adachi is it’s own problem though, because if Adachi knew then why didn’t he acknowledge them?

Kurosawa studies the photos carefully. It’s possible, he supposes, that these are manipulated somehow. Could someone be playing a trick on him?

Wait. There’s another video here. He taps it, tucking his knees under his chin to watch. Even though the thumbnail had been Adachi alone, in the Tokyodome outfit, the video starts panned out further, and Kurosawa is looking at his own smiling face.

“Today is...?” he hears himself say. Adachi glances over at him as he talks to the camera and the look on his face makes Kurosawa’s heart squeeze. This is the Adachi he loves, the one he’s always wanted but never been able to ask for.

“Date practice,” Adachi mumbles, shyly, looking down at his hands.

“What?” The camera points towards Adachi zooming in close.

“Don’t make me say it again.”

“What?”

“... Date practice”

“One more time, looking at the camera?”

“Date practice.”

Adachi is having trouble looking at the camera. He tries, but then looks away more often than not, and it’s the most adorable thing Kurosawa has seen in a while. Eventually the camera zooms back out to where Kurosawa is in the frame too.

Kurosawa’s tears are flowing freely now, because this is all he ever wanted. But what had he done to get it? And why doesn’t he remember?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks once again to [unacaritafeliz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/unacaritafeliz) for betaing, it would be much less good without you.

Adachi Kiyoshi has spent his entire day vehemently _not_ thinking about last night. He’s not going to think about going over to Kurosawa’s place, about the meal they almost shared, or about-

_I wish--_

No. He’s not going to think about it, particularly not while he’s at work. He skates through his day numbly, focusing on his work, or the food that he’s going to have for lunch, or the goddamn Doraemon theme song, anything to avoid thinking about what happened.

_I wish you--_

Halfway through the day, he starts a project that will probably take him more time than he has left to work on it. He challenges himself to try and finish it before the work day is over, a way to force himself to focus even harder on work, and if he doesn’t quite finish it, well it doesn’t hurt to stay a little late. If he went home all he’d do is wallow in misery and self-loathing anyway, so he might as well stay here and have something to do.

Sure enough, he ends up staying late. Kurosawa leaves halfway through the day, which helps his focus some, because he’s not always on the lookout to avoid running into him, but his mind still won’t shut up. But, as the people around him gradually leave for the day, he relaxes bit by bit. He’s still miserable, but there’s nobody to hide it from now, at least.

_I wish you could--_

No. He smacks his face lightly, and then sighs. A short break is probably in order - he could find a vending machine somewhere for some coffee, and come back to refocus. He nods firmly to himself. That’s what he’ll do.

Taking a break, however, turns out to be a poor choice, because as he’s walking all he can do is think.

_I wish you could just--_

Adachi starts humming loudly. Maybe Doraemon isn’t catchy enough to distract him. He starts singing Ponyo instead, though he can only remember half the lyrics so he just starts repeating _ponyo, ponyo_ on everything.

The struggle to remember lyrics distracts him enough that he nearly runs into someone coming out of the office as he returns.

“Oh, excuse me,” he says out of habit, and then he looks up. Of course it’s Kurosawa. He managed to avoid him all day, and Kurosawa _left_ hours ago, _why_ did he have to come back.

“Sorry,” Kurosawa says, flashing Adachi a concerned smile, “Are you okay?” Adachi can feel the tingle at the back of his nose and throat that means tears are coming, and he swallows hard. Seeing Kurosawa smile like this, like everything is fine, like they’re just colleagues _hurts_.

“Of course! I’m fine, I just, I wasn’t watching where I was going. I-” he can feel himself babbling in an attempt to cover up feeling flustered. He stops and takes a deep breath, and then looks up at Kurosawa, _really looks_ , “Are _you_ okay, Kurosawa?”

Maybe, just maybe, it didn’t really happen the way he remembered, or it was temporary. He studies Kurosawa’s face, looking for any hint that this isn’t real, that he remembers something, _anything_. Instead Kurosawa just gives him a tired smile, one that’s not out of place after a long day at work, and doesn’t mean anything in particular.

“I- Yes, I wasn’t paying attention either, you just startled me. I, uh, I had some paperwork to file.” He points over his shoulder and Adachi glances in that direction, even though he knows what’s over there. “I honestly thought everyone else had left.”

“Oh.”

They stand like that a few more moments. Adachi can’t stop himself from looking at Kurosawa’s face, no matter how many times he tries. The face of the man who used to be so in love with him that it showed, even in just the little moments. Adachi’s mind goes through a quick succession of moments against his will - Kurosawa’s disbelief when Adachi confessed, the glee from laughing together in the izakaya, the loving support through presentation practice… the tear stained numbness from last night…

 _I wish_ \--

No. Not in front of Kurosawa. He has to get away. What little will he has left, keeping him from reliving the scene from last night, is crumbling so he blurts out, “Well, I still have a little work to do.”

“Right! See you tomorrow,” Kurosawa says, as Adachi ducks around him, “Don’t work too late!” Adachi nods without looking around, and keeps going. If he looks around, then Kurosawa will see the tears threatening to spill over. He flops into his chair, and scoots as close as he can get to his desk, the edge of it pressing into his stomach, solid evidence that this is what is real, here and now. Maybe that will help.

It doesn’t. The lines of the spreadsheet swim in front of his eyes.

_I wish you could just forget--_

* * *

_Adachi had had a long day. He’d had his presentation which went fine but only because he had cheated. He’d been a bundle of nerves, but that doesn’t excuse what he’d done. Kurosawa had helped him out so much and he didn’t even make it past the presentation. On top of that, Kurosawa was thinking such damn supportive things, things about how he just wanted Adachi to be happy, and he couldn’t even do that._

_Kurosawa busily set out dishes on the table - a very Western meal with steak and various side dishes. It’s fine, a lovely meal, but Adachi just knew he wouldn’t be able to enjoy it properly. It wasn’t fair to Kurosawa to make him put up with Adachi when he was in this mood, really. Kurosawa, the wonderful, brilliant, amazing man, who fell in love with the wrong person. All Adachi did was drag him down._

_Perhaps, if Adachi didn’t have the magic he wouldn’t be a disappointment. He looked up at Kurosawa, who was serving him potatoes, and thinking about their Christmas Eve date, a surprise that Adachi now knew about, because of his magic. That wasn’t fair to Kurosawa either. If only he could be rid of it, then maybe he’d… they’d…_

_Kurosawa really was a wonderful man. It wouldn’t have been bad to lose his magic to him. He took a deep breath._

_“Kurosawa?”_

_“Mm?”_

_“About… the reward.”_

_“Oh, did I say what I was thinking out loud again?” Kurosawa’s eyes went wide in panic, and Adachi berated himself again._

_“No, I just… I don’t know much about that stuff. Can you… teach me?” Adachi asked, his heart pounding. If he’d judged Kurosawa right, he would want to take Adachi up on the offer, and then Adachi could lose his magic and stop worrying about overhearing things that are unfair to Kurosawa. He couldn’t keep taking advantage of his boyfriend like this. That’s not what relationships are about._

_Kurosawa seemed hesitant, but agreed. He got up, and walked over, slowly. Maybe he was giving Adachi a chance to say no? To back out? Kurosawa was really too kind for his own good, this wasn’t fair._

_The backs of Kurosawa’s fingers connected with Adachi’s face in a touch that might be soft and gentle, if it weren’t for the onslaught of thoughts that came with it. Thoughts about how_ kind _Adachi was, how he was trying so hard_ for _Kurosawa and how cute he was, even if this was unlike him._

_Finally Adachi couldn’t take it anymore, and he pushed Kurosawa back. Kurosawa stumbled, tripped, and landed on the floor, and suddenly Adachi realized what he’d done._

_“Sorry!” he said, chasing after Kurosawa. He heard Kurosawa wondering if he went too fast, and backed away, standing up. He could not cheat anymore. He_ had _to tell him._

_“There’s something I have to tell you,” he said in a rush, not trusting himself not to back out, “I can hear people’s thoughts when I touch them. I heard all of that about a surprise - the Anton building, right? And just now, you were worried about me acting weird. I know what it sounds like, but I promise I’m not lying.”_

_“Adachi, it’s okay, calm down,” Kurosawa said, pushing himself up from the floor. Adachi searched his face, but didn't see any kind of reprimand, just worry and care. Kurosawa clearly hadn’t understood, and Adachi opened his mouth to protest. Before he could, Kurosawa guided him backwards to sit back in the chair._

_“You’re speaking very earnestly. I don’t think you’re lying,” Kurosawa said._

_“No! You don’t get it! How can you be so calm? I’ve been reading your thoughts for-- I don’t know, a long time, since this whole thing started!” Adachi hiccupped and swallowed, before going on, “I didn’t think about it at first, but I’ve used it against you so many times.”_

_Kurosawa’s eyes began shining with tears, probably finally understanding what Adachi meant._

_“I wish you could just forget that we ever got close so I could stop hurting you!” Adachi blurted out, because he didn’t know how else to express the guilt and pain this is causing him. Sorry wasn’t good enough._

_The moment the words were out of his mouth, he felt something pop in his gut. It was like a soap bubble, floating in the air - reach out and touch it, and it suddenly disappears, and anything inside just flows out. Adachi was overwhelmed, briefly. It felt intense, like a wave at the beach crashing into his face and it felt like he couldn't breathe._

_Finally, he opened his eyes. Kurosawa was kneeling on the floor in front of him, eyes unfocused._

_“Kurosawa?” he asked after a moment. Kurosawa blinked and looked up._

_“A-Adachi? What are you doing here? Wait, are you crying?”_

_Adachi’s stomach sank. He reached a hand out to Kurosawa’s shoulder - he shouldn’t take advantage again, but he needed to confirm his suspicion._

How did Adachi get my address? I don’t think I’ve ever told it to him, have I? _Kurosawa thought, and Adachi felt like the tears were going to spill over again. Somehow, without even meaning to, Adachi’s wish had come true. He hadn’t even entirely meant it, he’d said it because he knew it wasn’t possible. Except that, somehow, it was._

_“I didn’t mean it!” Adachi scrambled to say, “I take it back.”_

_“Take what back?” Kurosawa asked._

_“I wish you hadn’t forgotten,” Adachi said, and he searched Kurosawa’s face. Kurosawa just blinked at him._

_“What did I forget?” Kurosawa asked after a moment._

_“Uhhhh… I wish you could remember?” Adachi tried again, wondering if it had to do with specific wording. He felt the insides of his eyelids begin to itch again, with unshed tears._

_“What’s wrong, Adachi, you’re scaring me,” Kurosawa asked. A few moments ago, Kurosawa might have reached for his arm, or his shoulder, trying to comfort him. Instead he just stared at Adachi, forehead creased in concern._

_“Right. Of course. This is all my shitty karma anyway, why should I be able to fix it?” Adachi said, tears spilling over, hot and fast._

_“Adachi?”_

_“Maybe… maybe this is for the best, you know? You forget… everything, and I just, I go back to who I was before. At least I’ll stop meddling in your life.” Adachi sniffled, and took a deep breath._

_“Wha--”_

_“I wish that you would forget everything to do with our relationship. Forget I was here, forget this nice dinner, just. Forget.”_

_“But I have to put it away…” Kurosawa started, but his eyes began to unfocus._

_“Wait!” Adachi said, and tried his best to hold back the growing feeling of pressure in his gut that he knew was the magic taking hold, “You can do that. You should… the food shouldn’t go to waste, just put it away and then… then forget.” Adachi didn’t know if that would work, but he couldn't hold on any longer, so he let go. Kurosawa’s face went blank, and he stood up from his crouch, completely ignoring Adachi now. He walked woodenly over to the cabinet to get things to put dinner away in. Adachi watched him mechanically begin to spoon mashed potatoes into another dish for a few moments before standing up himself._

_“I’m sorry,” he whispered._

_And with that, he walked out of Kurosawa’s door, and out of their relationship forever._

* * *

Adachi comes back to himself, realizing that he’s been staring at the spreadsheet without seeing it for far too long. There are tears streaming down his face, and he swipes at them angrily, looking around to make sure that Kurosawa actually left. Then he takes a deep hiccup-y breath, and attempts to refocus on his work.

After spending all day avoiding thinking about it, though, it seems like reliving the memory of last night has broken the seal. No matter what he does, he can’t get the look on Kurosawa’s face last night, just before he forgot everything, out of his head. That loving _painfully_ unconditional support. Adachi will never see that again. He balls his hands into fists, digging his nails into his palms, and a few more tears slip out from under his eyelids.

He’d been ready to walk out. To say that they needed to break up, that he couldn’t be with Kurosawa and be fair to him because he cannot turn off the magic. He wasn’t going to bring it up but he was ready for that to be the decision that Kurosawa made.

Instead the magic had made the decision for him. Kurosawa forgot, and… well if Adachi is being honest with himself, it’s probably for the best. If he had let himself stay in a relationship with Kurosawa much longer, he wouldn’t have been able to let go. Just the fact that he can no longer talk to Kurosawa, eat with him, do any of the things that Kurosawa had slowly taught him were a part of a healthy relationship - missing those things is only driving home the point that Adachi _loves_ Kurosawa. If it weren’t for the fact that he loved him, he wouldn’t care that he’s hurting Kurosawa.

The worst part is he doesn’t know how to undo it. He’s never been able to undo anything - well, how can you unhear something somebody thought, anyway? Maybe that’s for the best too. After all, seeing Kurosawa today might have been enough to make him lose his resolve. Maybe it’s selfish of him to want Kurosawa back, but then, he’s always known how selfish he is.

Adachi scrubs his face with his hands. Clearly after his encounter with Kurosawa, he’s not going to be able to get any more work done. He sighs, and closes his laptop. He can cry at home just as easily as he can cry here, and then nobody will walk in on him. He packs up his things, and heads out, taking one last look at the room as he turns out the last of the lights. It’s going to be a difficult week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me, back in January when I had the idea: It's a one-shot, MAYBE a two shot at most  
> Me, before starting writing it a few weeks ago: It's a two-shot, but that'll be plenty.  
> Me, now: 🤡  
>   
> Anyway, do please note that the chapter count has changed, but it's STILL GOING TO HAVE A HAPPY ENDING I PROMISE.

**Author's Note:**

> ... I'm sorry? Sometimes the Brain Monkeys insist on pain. I promise there'll be a happy ending.


End file.
